A Breakfast of Silence

It’s a fact: you’re an adult. You know you’re an adult. Everyone knows you’re an adult, everyone accepts that you’re an adult. The only person who disputes this fact is your mother and that is because a room in your home is dirty. She’s just gotten in from an early morning, late night, whatever and what she was willing to ignore due to fatigue earlier, sleep has recharged her lecture batteries. At this point, you have two options. You could kick/usher her out as soon as she wakes up. I wouldn’t personally recommend this. First, when your mother is angry, everyone in the household knows it. (Why do that to your father?) Second, if your mother is anything like my mother, she’ll eventually get you back for that one. My mother’s wrath is like a poisonous spider hiding in your shoe, you literally step into it and it’s devastating. So that leaves you with one other choice: make her a breakfast that will shut her up.


This will take you forty minutes. Tops.

An Ugly Omelet with Biscuits toped with a Mixed Berry Syrup

We’ll start with the biscuits first because you can handle everything else fairly easily once they are in the oven.


What affect a biscuit’s texture isn’t so much the ingredients, as how the dough is handled. This is a quick recipe, meaning that you can’t roll the dough too much or it will ruin the texture.


  • 2 Cups Flour
  • 1 Tablespoon Baking Powder
  • 1 Teaspoon Salt
  • 1 Tablespoon Sugar
  • 1/3 Cup Shortening (I prefer butter flavored)
  • 1 Cup Milk or Buttermilk


Heat oven to 400°.

IMG_0114Mix the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar together. Cut the shortening in the mix with a fork until the mix looks like course meal. This is just a fancy way of saying take a fork, smash the shortening into little pieces, and mix with the flour. Create a hole in the middle of the mixture and pour the milk in slowly. Gradually pour it in until the dough pulls away from the side of the bowl. Turn the mixture over onto a floured surface and knead exactly 10 times. Pat or roll the dough into desired thickness and cut. Repeat until dough is all used up. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes, until desired brownness.

Now start the Berry Syrup.

Berry Syrup

Be prepared to be underwhelmed.


  • 12 Onces of Frozen Mixed Berries
  • 2 Tablespoons of Honey


Place the frozen berries into a pot with the honey. Turn the isle onto medium and let it come to a slight boil. Add more honey to taste.

Once the Berry Syrup is on the stove start in with the Ugly Omelet.

An Ugly Omelet

I don’t know how to make an omelet to save my life; I just know how to put things into an egg and scramble. Truth be told, you can add anything you want to this. Plus, if you know how to make a real omelet, go ahead.


  • 4 Eggs
  • 1 Tablespoon butter
  • ½ Tomatoes chopped or 6 Cherry Tomatoes cut in half
  • 1 Cup Spinach
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  • Parmesan Cheese (optional)


Melt about half of the butter into the pan, and then add tomatoes and spinach. Cook until the spinach is completely wilted. Add in the rest of the butter. Once this is melted, add in the eggs and scramble. Be careful with the salt though, a little seems to go a long way with this recipe.

If you started making everything one at a time, you’ll find that by the time you have the omelet and berry syrup done, the biscuits should be ready. Even if it takes you more than 40 minutes to make this, the sheer ambitiousness alone is enough to get Mama off you’re back while your cooking.

Thanks for reading and enjoy.


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